I was a kid from the 50’s living in Flushing, New York City.  That’s when Flushing had only 3 Chinese people there – and, by the way, I knew all of them. Wait, wait, I forgot, there was Ling Ling, too, so there were four.   No, no, I’m sorry.  Mistake.   Ling Ling was...

Maybe the Lord wanted someone with a pure heart.  Mine, however, was infarcted.  I guess he overlooked that little flaw when he saw my overall righteousness.  In any case He, or one of his emissaries, called upon me recently in the middle of the night, around 12:30 AM...

A lot of people I know think that I’m a Debbie Downer.  It’s because of my flat affect – I look morose most of the time.  When I play ping pong with that dour, cheerless look, it’s infectious and the guy I’m playing with for 20 minutes usually ends up either wanting...

A few of my so-called friends have approached me recently and have asked me - rather bluntly  I might add - why I am so cheap, and they have even had the temerity to accuse me of never having bought anything at my Shoprite that wasn’t on sale.  First of all, I reject...

Editor:  Lao Du, how are you feeling? LD:  Well, except  for the cough, the fever and the shortness of breath, I’m fine. Editor:  That’s not funny. LD:  Ok, ok, no shortness of breath. Editor: Still not funny. LD:  Ok, okay, I would feel much better if I could notch...

The Governor of NY just announced that Phase IV is about to happen in Westchester County.  Before you jump up and down like a third grader who’s just been handed a Three Musketeers bar before going outside for recess, you should know that this phase 4 opening excludes...

Several weeks ago, I gave myself a haircut.  Not a good idea.   On the side of my head, just a little northeast of my left ear, it looks like some golfer left a large divot with a sand wedge.  Well, ordinarily it would have been a big deal, and I would probably have...

Not everybody is physically fit.  I mean there are  some people in the club who hit a few balls and suddenly they’re breathless and gasping for air.  This is bad.  Before COVID 19 it wasn’t bad, but now it’s really bad. Why?  Because of the nature of the air flow. ...

If you’ve been following Governor Cuomo’s news conferences, then you probably know that New York is just beginning to schedule a four phase reopening of businesses by geographical region.  Several areas upstate have already been granted the green light to remove some...

Editor: Lao Du, can’t you think of something positive.  Everything you say is characterized by rejection and opposition.  It wears a little thin, especially in Ping Pong Parkinson where you never hear a discouraging word.  Try to say at least one thing good that’s...